Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Three Days With Meghan: Day One

I can't remember how exactly I came to stumble across some videos of a yogi named Meghan Currie, but I immediately recognized in her a bit of a kindred spirit. Her style of yoga and even her style of putting together videos reminded me of myself. Her dance-like quality of flowing and exploring in videos that are humbly set in a regular old room or a patch of sand, put to funky music, made me nostalgic for when I used to create dance improvisation videos in my tiny apartment while living in Japan. I could tell that in the same way that I had been doing, she was using these sessions of self expression as an artist does when they practice their skills. When I watched or followed along one of her online classes, I thought - this is exactly how I would move if I had the same abilities. She's crazy super strong and controlled and yet serenely gentle at the same time.

So when I saw randomly that she was going to be teaching workshops near where I am living in little Trinidad I immediately picked up the phone and booked my spot. I was not going to miss this.

Last night was the first workshop. I knew it would be challenging for me although I am an experienced mover (dance training from the age of 3 to the age of....now hehe) and practicing yoga for an average of 10 years, and now teaching yoga for a few years. I knew it would be hard because I knew it was going to be in a hot hot hot hot room with many hot breathing bodies. And I was right. I was beyond right because there was not a single fan, not a window open, not a door open, no air. This is my worst environment. I'm not saying it is THE worst as if everyone in the world should agree with me. It is the worst environment for my body and how I'm made up. I'm from Canada, and I'm the kind of Canadian who LIKES winter, although fall is my favourite season. Anywho, getting off topic. The place was warm. We were packed in like sardines. But I was just so happy she was there and I was there and we were all there.

We began. Meghan with her unique voice guided us to find "the tiniest sensation" in our selves. Easily, I felt the tiny drum of my resting heart beat. We continued through a slow, attentive, mildly torturous sequence that melted off at least one bucket of sweat. The sequence was familiar to me since I had often used her videos for my personal practice at home, but it was the most fully I had engaged with myself in a long time. The energy of having a live teacher there in the room, and whole lot of people around you focusing on their own experience makes your concentration narrow to a laser beam precision. I felt my whole body buzzing with the joy of being fully engaged, fully in my attention.

For the last half of the class we worked up to experiencing handstand with the help of supporting partners by taking three of four separate preparations that realigned our bodies and connected our upper bodies to our lower bodies through the integration of our core. I can't wait to do it some more because I now understand what I have to feel in order to achieve proper and efficient alignment and engagement.

As we made our way back to Savasana, the lights went out, the music swelled and in the momentary silence I found myself swimming in some emotional thoughts of how lucky I am for so many things in my life. At the same time I felt a creeping guilt, or a sense of why should I deserve all these good things? As soon as I acknowledged what it was I had just thought I chose to change that doubt to acceptance. I simply started saying thank you. A second later Meghan's voice came back in guiding us through Savasana and she said, "the most sweetly healing thing we can do for ourselves is to say thank you". I smiled. I was affirmed that we really are on the same page, as I'm sure most everyone in that room felt as well.

Looking forward to going back for more tonight to see what's in store.

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